Sunday, September 25, 2011

Texteses

I was just reading back through some texts this morning and fell out. I thought I'd post it here for others to enjoy. Some of it is PG13-ish, some of it is down right makeyawannavomit-ish. All is hilarious.

Italics is me, bold is Sean

Theres something wrong with me. My hands & feet itch like crazy, but there's nothing there. Is there an allergic rxn that only comes out in the hands&feet?  Sent: 8:40AM

Starting to wonder if ants are getting on me in my sleep. Or if theres something in the couch that my bodys reacting to.  Sent: 8:50AM

This happened yesterday morning, too, but not as bad.  Sent: 8:51AM

If it were ants you would have bites elsewhere other than just your hands and feet. Most food allergies manifest as itchy hands and feetSent: 9:18AM

I feel better after a shower. Not as itchy, but still itchy. The only new foods I've had, two days in a row, is salad dressing. I think I've had it before tho...  Sent 9:20AM

Are there any marks? Sent 9:20AM

No. Just red. Only my palms and bottom of my feet. Itchy toes & fingers. Sent 9:21AM

That's an allergic rxn Sent 9:21AM

That takes place 12 hrs later? Sent 9:21AM

Yep. Remember our honeymoon? Sent 9:22AM

That was NOT the artichokes. Sent 9:22AM

it was you then  Sent 9:22AM

It must be the dressing. Sent 9:23AM

People have died from peanuts Sent 9:23 AM

Peanut allergies are vaccine related Sent 9:24AM

get rid of the dressing  Sent 9:24AM

K. Taking kids to the park before it's too hot. 102 today. Sent 9:25 AM

Oh gross.nasty crap smell is back! Sent 9:26AM

I will fix that. Tank needs to be flushed. If you want me to walk u thru it i will Sent 9:29AM

So we only have to live with it for 5 more days. Mmmmm

Nope Sent 9:30AM

U can add more liquid enzyme to the tank if u need to

Don't understand why sometimes it's fine...it only stinks in waves. Sent 9:31AM

Have fun at the park. I don't have an answer for that. The seal needs to be cleaned. That keeps a water seal in the toilet and prevents gas from leaking into the coach.

Vomit. Sent 9:34AM

i dont even want to know how THAT has to be fixed. Sent 9:35AM

want me to tell you how...its easy. u need gloves and a plastic knife. Sent 9:37AM

i'll have you talk me thru it later. Sent 9:37AM

you take the knife with some toilet paper on the end and stick it inside the seal. go around once and thats it. Sent 9:37AM

and how many times do u think i'll vomit doing so?

maybe 4 :) you are tough though  Sent 9:38AM

Feet and hands don't itch. Now its my knees and elbows. Is it moving inward? Will it be my boobs next?!?  Sent 9:41AM

I don't know. No trouble breathing right? When it gets there send me a picture so I can diagnose it. Sent 9:43AM

haha Sent 9:43AM

Enjoy the park sweet. I will talk to you later. Sent 9:45AM

*****

Trying to feed the fish at the park. Found 2 boxes of condoms. classy huh   Sent 10:23AM

on base  Sent 10:23AM

nothing says romance like doing it on gov't property  Sent 10:24AM

wow  Sent 10:24AM

there is a dirty towel a few yards down. starting to wonder if it's a crime scene Sent 10:25AM

you should leave soon if you are the only one there. Sent 10:25AM

there is 1 lone biker with a yearning look on his face...Sent 10:26AM

Not funny Sent 10:26AM

lol  Sent 10:26AM

Gonna go to the commissary to get some food. Be safe please and text me later. Sent 10:30 AM

2 German ladies showed up with their kids. Wish I could understand them. I think they're talking about me...Maybe I should yell something at the kids in German, just to freak them out Sent 10:33AM

*****

I gagged three times, btw. My goodness, you owe me. Altho, this freakin rv is just as much my problem as yours. I am one tough chick, even if I do want to barf over the smells i just smelled. Sent 11:00AM

of course!!! the seal still isn't holding. Sent 11:02AM

I'm gonna cry. I'm not strong at all. Sent 11:02AM

I know babe. I am sorry but thank you for being tough. Sent 11:03AM

This is horrible & unthinkable. No one should ever have to touch any part of a toilet with their hands!!!! i think the plastic knife adds to the grossness Sent 11:03AM

take the knife around the inside cap. the seal should move downward to allow you to get btw the seal. Debris gets pushed down there and pushes the seal away so water leaks around  Sent 11:05 AM

Debris...nice  Sent 11:06AM

well i dont want to make you any sicker  Sent 11:06AM

any luck Sent 11:08AM

gang count up to 5. i'm scaring the children. Sent 11:08AM

*gag  Sent 11:08AM

ok then maybe stop Sent 11:08AM

oh my gosh the whole motor home stinks so bad  Sent 11:09AM

Let Simon do it...they like gross stuff...make sure he has gloves on though Sent 11:10AM

but but but but but, it seems to be holding the seal Sent 11:10AM

No, I did it. I'm hong to blog this whole interchange. Sent 11:10AM

*going

Great. Not open a window and open the vents to cross ventilate. Add more cleaner to the tank. If you did that you can def flush the tank. Sent 11:13AM

crap its not holding the seal  Sent 11:13AM

*****

At this point, I placed a call to my husband. I wasn't necessarily the prim and proper woman he married, but we laughed a lot and I successfully "flushed the tank". I gained a whoooooole LOT of repect for the things he usually handles.

Most importantly, I finally invested myself(up to my elbows) in RV ownership.

4 comments:

Corey said...

so do you not have full hookups where you are? you have to drive to a dump station to empty your tank? that can't be fun for a single mother! i've had so many of the same type of things happen when Pete has been away. Sometimes I joke and say "didn't I marry you so YOU could do these things?!"
I had to bury a dead dog last year. And explain to crying children why their dog died. That was the worst!

Kolt and Susannah said...

send a pic so i can diagnose it......BUAHAHAHAHA!

seriously though, much respect to a woman who can deal with crap like that! ;)

Brown English Muffin said...

I bet you didn't itch after doing all that did you! LOL

Anonymous said...

LOL, thank you so very much for sharing. I mean it. It is almost like spending time with you guys. We miss you so much. Love Mom