Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Great idea.

I mentioned that we received quite a bit of rain lately. Our lake has gone from looking terrible and muddy and murky and pollen covered to...picturesque once again. 
 As Felix received some kayaks for his birthday and hasn't been able to use them much, we jumped at the chance to put them in the water today. These pictures are not from today. These pictures are from a day last week in which I had a functioning brain cell. 
 On this particular day of playing with my camera, I stayed on the dock. I realized the sun was setting quickly and we didn't have time to drag both kayaks down to the water. I had fun nonetheless and stayed neat and tidy. 
 Today, however, is a different story. My children were being less than desirable to be around. The only time they spoke to one another civilly was when they were playing war. I can't make this stuff up. I have learned over the years that when they're being less than desirable to be around, I can either wear their little butts out or at least get them far enough away that I can't hear them bicker. So we went for a bike ride and I nailed two birds with one stone. Two birds. Trouble is, I have four birds. 
After the bike ride, the biggest bird was tasked with entertaining the two littlest birds and Felix and I got the kayaks down the hill. Our neighbors have a dock. It's hard to get to, it's broken, the first board is mildew laden and slick as freshly zambonied ice, but it's access to the lake. They've offered us use of it any time we want. As an Amport, I just can't do anything the easy way.
 "Let's drag 'em down our hill. We can put in from the bottom of our hill," I said. The Amport child, having also inherited the gene that doesn't allow him to do anything the easy way, agreed. We realized the error we'd made, but we committed ourselves to following through with this plan. Though the days and days of rain we've had lately caused the lake to rise, it gave an illusion of being deeper than it actually is. 
 As we plopped the kayaks into the mud, I thought surely it was just for a foot or two. Um, no, actually. The mud went on for a good...I don't even know. The weight of our bodies in the kayak caused them to push all the water away and sink into mud. There was enough water that there was really no way to get back to dry land easily, but not enough water to paddle in. We stood up on the kayaks like paddle boards and tried it that way. About four unsuccessful paddles and ten minutes later I became aware that neighbors were watching. It may have all been in my head, but I felt judgmental eyes.
 Our lake doesn't allow gas motors. We get an occasional fishing boat(powered by an electric trawler) or a kayak every once in a while. The boaters are infrequent enough that we still find ourselves drawn to the kitchen window to take notice. I imagine all of my neighbors are the same. :/ It's really hard to look like you know what you're doing when you so clearly don't. 
 After about fifteen minutes, we had finally jumped and dragged and pushed and rowed our way through the mud to the open water. I figured out that if we stood as far back as we could and pushed against the mud, we could get through it more easily than the other many, many methods we were trying. 

As Felix caught up to me in the open water, we engaged in some friendly banter. We were less than five strokes in when I heard it. There wasn't even time to turn around before the sky completely opened up on us. It seriously only poured for about thirty seconds. Juuuuust long enough to drench us. It was very much the icing on the cake of our lil adventure. 
As it turns out, making fools of ourselves and getting mud caked was just what we needed. I have a feeling we'll remember this story for a long, long time. We learned our lesson and exited the lake via our neighbors dock(which is for sale along with their house...SOB...greatest neighbors EVER!). If anyone is looking to move out to our neck of the woods, I can hook you up. I mean, with great neighbors. I can't hook you up with anything other than that.  

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